I don’t believe in laziness. If someone (or you even) is behaving “lazily” and it is not in their best interest, it's better to get curious rather than passing judgment. Passing judgment can be described as “lazy.” *Kidding* But seriously…
Decreased Activity As a Defense What is often labeled as laziness may actually be a manifestation of various underlying factors such as unhelpful beliefs that come from developmental wounding, overwhelm, fear, dysregulation, and chronic freeze states. When we judge someone as lazy, we are shortcutting our own anxiety and frustration about the individual's situation. Time and again, I have worked with someone who calls themselves “lazy” just to find that they live with an entrenched dissociation pattern barricaded by a multilayered defense system that was once constructed for many good reasons. Beliefs and unspoken mandates regarding productivity and success are fertile grounds for wayward family and cultural dynamics that inspire such defensiveness. How convenient for unhealthy relational systems that the term "lazy" carries a negative connotation and implies a moral failing or character flaw. The “lazy” person then holds the harm and stigma, occupying the role of the scapegoat upon which others can project aspects of themselves of which they are fearful. Rather than working to understand the legitimate wound behind the “laziness,” the “lazy” person is judged, typecast, and at times discarded. That is not to say that someone’s avoidance and inactivity won’t become a problem. I believe that avoidance and inactivity is less likely to become entrenched if the person is met with curiosity rather than judgment and enabling as soon as the pattern emerges. An Adaptation to Systemic Oppression At the societal level, human behavior is highly influenced by environmental, social, and psychological factors. What may appear as laziness to an outsider could be a result of systemic issues such as poverty, lack of access to resources, the addictive nature of screens and highly palatable foods, or societal expectations from certain cultures. Rest and Inactivity is Healthy and Normal Furthermore, the idea of laziness often overlooks the importance of self-care, rest, and prioritizing mental and physical well-being. Taking breaks, setting boundaries, and practicing self-compassion are essential aspects of maintaining overall health and productivity. People who are fearful of rest might label healthy pausing and self-advocacy activities as lazy so they do not have to address the anxiety they feel when attempting to adopt those actions for themselves. Periods of inactivity are essential in certain contexts, even for people with healthy belief systems. While “laziness” is often associated with avoiding work or exerting effort, it may just be a sign that someone needs a break from the exertion or needs to engage in mental indexing. Mental indexing is the cognitive process of organizing and categorizing information in the mind for efficient retrieval and use. We need periods of lower sensory input for our brains to do this important job Taking breaks and allowing oneself to be "lazy" at times can be essential for mental and emotional well-being. Overworking or constantly pushing oneself without adequate rest can lead to burnout, stress, and decreased productivity. By listening to signals of fatigue or boredom and taking breaks as needed, individuals can maintain a healthier work-life balance and sustain long-term productivity and satisfaction. Powering Down for Survival In evolutionary terms, conserving energy was crucial for survival, particularly in environments where resources were scarce or unpredictable. In such situations, individuals who were able to prioritize rest and conserve energy when necessary were more likely to survive and pass on their genes. This reflects what we now understand about dorsal vagal activation aka hypoarousal. When someone has tried many ways to solve problems over a long period of time and has been unsuccessful due to no fault of their own, the nervous system may respond first by becoming overly activated, and then by falling into underactivation moving the person into a sort of dormant state. You especially see this in people who had long term developmental wounding in childhood or people who endured a long term traumatic experience in some form of isolation. Powering down to conserve resources and “waiting it out” is highly adaptive in such a scenario. "Lazy" = Innovative In a different context, “laziness,” or rather the tendency to find the path of least resistance, can prompt individuals to find more efficient or innovative ways to accomplish tasks, leading to increased productivity in the long run. When faced with a repetitive or mundane task, the desire to avoid unnecessary effort may drive individuals to seek out shortcuts, automation, or creative solutions to streamline their workflow. Doing so is in everyone’s best interest as long as this does not negatively affect the final product. Get Curious Therefore, rather than dismissing yourself or others as lazy, it is more constructive to approach the situation with empathy, understanding, and a willingness to get curious about what may be contributing to their behavior, whether contributing factors are adaptive or maladaptive. By reframing our understanding of laziness and focusing on support, encouragement, and addressing root causes, we can create a more effective and compassionate approach to human behavior.
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AuthorProsopon Therapy Archives
April 2024
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