Do you ever get the feeling of overwhelm or like you're being swept away by an emotional reaction to an event or by life itself? Like a tidal wave, big sensations in the body and wild thoughts in the mind can feel like they are swallowing us whole; like our whole existence is this feeling; that it always has been and always will be. People tend to fear pain. Emotional pain can be just as bad as or worse than physical pain. Emotional pain is physical pain. When we have emotional distress bodies tighten, contorting the tissues into painful knots. A sense of darkness can befall the eyes and a hot metallic fear sears the lungs and face. You can “just get over” emotional pain to the same degree as you can physical pain. It really depends on the severity of the pain. Small pain you can “walk it off.” Big pain takes over your entire existence. Big pain was a common feeling for me throughout my young years. I separately wanted to get past it but I just couldn't find the way. Life felt like a prison to endure. One day, I had a profound turning point in my experience of the world. At 17 years old, after a significant personal crisis, I remember standing in the office of a personal growth mentor suddenly feeling like I was looking down on myself and the scene. I felt a feeling of giddy joy as I began to realize the context in which my pain occurs. I now understand that I gained access to Dual Awareness that day. I was still consumed by pain for long periods of time, but slowly I incorporated more and more of the ability to feel my feelings while simultaneously staying in touch with the context. Dual awareness typically refers to the ability to be aware of both internal experiences (such as thoughts, emotions, bodily sensations) and external stimuli (such as events happening around you) simultaneously. This term is often used in the context of therapy, particularly in approaches like dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) or mindfulness-based therapies like Sensorimotor Psychotherapy. Part of me is directly experiencing what is going on inside my body including sensations, movement impulses, and thoughts while another part of me acts as a Mindful Witnessing Observer (MWO). The MWO observes the inner sensations and external context with curiosity and openness. In therapy, dual awareness involves being able to observe and acknowledge your internal experiences without becoming overwhelmed by them, while also remaining attuned to the external environment. It's a skill that can be particularly helpful for those who struggle with being overtaken by emotions, as it allows them to maintain a balanced perspective and make more intentional choices in response to their experiences. In trauma therapy, we know that we cannot fully process trauma without the presence of dual awareness because, without it, we strengthen the traumatized neural pathway rather than creating a new metabolized experience.
Dual awareness can be cultivated through techniques like mindfulness meditation, where you practice observing your thoughts and feelings without getting caught up in them, while also remaining aware of their surroundings and the present moment. This can lead to increased emotional resilience and a greater sense of overall well-being. Whatever the reason you have for cultivating dual awareness, whether that is to deal with longstanding big pain or simply to increase your sense of wellbeing, you will most likely benefit from the practice. When I first began to have access to dual awareness I felt a major shift in my conscious awareness. While this shift ultimately proved to be beneficial, it was also somewhat confusing and disorienting being so new to me. I also had a tendency to forget to shift into dual awareness for years after. Eventually, I stopped forgetting so much and dual awareness became more of my default rather than something I had to remember. Practices like yoga and meditation helped me intentionally create a relationship with deal awareness but, ultimately, the most important thing was to learn to be in dual awareness throughout the ordinary moments of my days. The result for me has been a huge increase in a sense of trust, appreciation for life, more deliberate responding with less reactivity, and a more compassionate attitude towards myself and others.
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AuthorProsopon Therapy Archives
April 2024
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